Now What?

I have been back just over a week. Did I cease to exhist in this time? No, though my blogs become few and far between I promise I am still thinking, feeling, and exhisting... I think I go into a bit of a hibernate mode- not all of me, but definitely a piece of me ends up in a deep contemplative thought not meant to be brought out and exposed until it simmers and develops. Maybe I learn more this way...

One thing is for certain, who I was before is no more, and even as I write this I find it hard to express exactly what is going on- you'd probably best understand over a long car ride or coffee, but seeing as for many of you that's not feasible you get the bits and pieces I am able to accumulate. I am for sure changing my major- which to some of you sounds pretty big, but only on an academic standpoint- It is much bigger than that- it is a very huge God thing. I have NEVER had a four year plans- part of me doesn't believe in them, but this other part has been frustrated with the lack of a sense of direction in my life. That season of my life is currently over (though I'm full well aware that God can and will bring me right back to that place if it is His will) in the meantime, I will be studying Psychology with the hopes of pursuing a Masters in Occupational therapy. WHAT?!? In other words, everything I've worked on for the past three years is more or less out the window- and I have never felt more at peace with a decision. In fact, for the time being, God is telling me to let go of theatre all together... and I currently have no plans of auditioning, or squeezing theatre classes in- and I'm okay with that. I reread that, and still find myself shaking my head, I was told to lay it down, and though it goes against all logic and practicality that's what I'm doing- crazy, but good crazy...

I'm hoping to return to Romania- possibly as soon as Christmas time, and with no interest in the musical I can stay longer than the 10 day trip- who knows what God may choose to do in this time. A friend from work will be coming with me... and I'm hoping to recruit a few more, we're already planning a benifit, getting there will be a growth experience in itself:) I feel like- no I know I left a piece of myself there, and I left, knowing full well I'd return, in fact one day I very well may reside there- God only knows- I'm listening to- not just hearing- God:)

There is nothing in the world as delightful as a continual walk with God, dwelling in his presence:)