Occasionally I wish I could blog the same way people use twitter- processing my thoughts when they're fresh and on my mind. Unfortunately pulling out my phone in the middle of a shift and attempting to use my phone's qwerty keyboard to publish here may not be the wisest idea- instead you'll have to settle for some day old (or more) thoughts...
As previously metioned I've FINALLY been learning how to drive- I realised pretty quickly that i- until my schedule would coordinate with friends' it would probably never happen, besides seeing as I'll probably have to be taking road trips to Minnesota sooner rather than later with all the life changes occuring in my best friends' lives, I figured I wanted to be sure I was going to be a good driver- not just capable of passing the road test, and so, I've been taking lessons through Knoxville Driving School with a guy named Rick. Our first lesson we wound up talking about my story (he's a Christian) and since then I've gotten to learn more about his. Yesterday he told me that he felt like God brought me into his life for a reason (and yes- the thought of actually being used by God while I'm here in a waiting room kind of made me weepy) and anyhow, has decided not to charge me anymore, and will continue to work with me until I get my liscence. For free... Have I ever mentioned how incredibly amazing God's favor is?? I'm essentially going to recieve thousands of dollars of behind the wheel training for free. God is good :o)
This waiting room they call Knoxville is certainly an "out of season" time for me. I'm out of my element, not only stuck in this country, but also away from a lot of the people who are most important to me. I've been struggling lately with whether or not I'm really where I'm supposed to be, and what the purpose even is of my time here- but Tuesday night at work reminded me how important it is to be aware of what's happening right in front of me- even when my heart so deeply longs to be elsewhere, because God has me where I am at this time and will complete his purpose for me- Anyhow, I've already gotten to have some sweet conversations with coworkers- but Tuesday conversations with guests kept shifting to my faith... and Indian man sitting at my bar asked about my tattoos, and after I explained each one and walked through an abrviated version of my testimony wound up asking how my faith makes me different... The Lord gave me complete boldness with him... I can hardly remember my response, but I know it suprised even me :o) Later that night I was serving a group of guys, and again somehow the conversation shifted into my faith- they asked if I was religious... knowing I could potentially get in trouble for preaching the gospel to them while working I told them I could easily talk with them for quite some time about Jesus... but they probably wouldn't really be interested- their response was "Actually go ahead- we've got nothing else to do and you kind of have us curious" Ready, set, 20 minutes of gospel preaching... to a table, while I was working, within earshot of my manager.That time I'm positive nothing that came out of my mouth was from me. God uses us, even when we feel like we're stuck. Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction.>(2 Timothy 4:2)
And finally, how He loves to give good gifts to His children... I know I'm always completely undeserving of His grace- but lately I feel like I've been stuck in such complacency... and so distracted that it's especially so. Yet He continues to meet all of my needs- sometimes before I even ask. I got a phone call from Red Robin the other day, I'd put in an application with them in July when I first moved here and they still remembered me. Long story short, without even trying I aquired a second job- went in today for what I thought would be an interview but really we just discussed how my Red Robin schedule will fit around my brixx schedule. The next few months are going to be very busy- but I'm hoping that the extra income will get me to a place where I can get caught up on those student loans, aquire a car, and hopefully, soon get to the point where I'm in better shape financially for whatever ministry He leads me into next. It's going to be rough- I know I'll be exhausted, but I will definitely need to rely completely on God's grace to sustain me- and that will be a good thing. Time will tell how long this will last. It's all in His hands.
Giving up my dreams for His is evidently a bit of a process...
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